Lucky ~ Unlucky

December 17, 2014

My Dearest Raymond

It was a thrill & surprise to hear your voice yesterday. I’m so glad the best wishes I sent were well received. I really was doing so well in my quest to forget about you. I had almost turned a corner. But it all seems to fly out the window where you’re concerned. I’m going to continue my letters, they aren’t just for you, but an outlet for me, Here is my latest bad poetry about you.

Lucky, Unlucky

Which one I can’t tell

Cause ever since I met you

I’ve been under a spell.

Some people wait a life time

to feel just like this,

Lucky, Unlucky

Never kissed, yet blissed.

This energy between us

has no place to go,

This crazy love between us

Just seems to grow and grow.

Unlucky that I met you

Unlucky for us both

Time stands still here

Love’s grip won’t let go.

Lucky that I met you

Lucky you looked into my eyes,

Lucky to have loved you

All these years of my life.

Sage xo

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Sacred

December 16, 2014

There’s a place that I go

Beyond the sky and clouds,

Beyond every boundary

Where I can think my thoughts out loud.

The world crashing down

or calm ocean blue,

That one sacred place

I can simply be with you.

It started when we were young,

And I hope it lasts til we’re old,

A thousand miles between us

Our love never burns cold.

We’ve loved in different lifetimes

My soul knows the truth,

The spectacular place I go

And wrap myself up in you.

Sage xo

Unabashedly

December 10, 2014

Dear Raymond,

I got your letter in the mail today. I apologize for not writing all these months. I finally did it. Well almost. I put everything into perspective, got some clarity and decided to close the door. It was as simple and hard as that. I put every thought of you out of my head, and reminded myself every time I thought of you that it was impossible.

I saw you unexpectedly and I really was surprised. I’ve spent these months working on my future. I’m not sure if you’ll keep in touch but when I got your letter I felt sad. It was the truth cementing. I am beginning to understand that people come in and out of our lives for a reason. They don’t always stay and relationships don’t always manifest in the way we want them to. So I felt happy for you and sad all in the same moment.

Without even knowing it, we have an impact on others in ways we can’t even begin to imagine. I want you to know. That you were my first love. It doesn’t matter that it was unrequited and unspoken. The impact you had helped me to believe and have faith in love. Your character, your presence, the gifts you gave me that have no names but are still with me to this day. I know what a real man is, and I know trust because you showed it to me.

I can’t even count the ways you touched my heart. And I hope, that in some ways that I touched yours. I will never forget you. No matter where I end up or who comes in and out of my life, I will always cherish the moments we shared. I carry the best in my heart. I’m sad too and won’t lie, I’m ruminating that if we hadn’t run into each other again, I wouldn’t have had to go through all of this then saying goodbye once again. But when I’m done with my tears, like the woman I am, I remind myself that real love cannot be labelled, stifled or contained. That no matter how it was wrong, it was all worth it.

I wish you all the very best. I hope your life is a charmed one. I hope you’ve found your one true love. And most of all, I want your life to be magic. It seems like only yesterday but time waits for no one. I am privileged and a better person for having known you. And because of our experience, I will be able to recognize real love, if I ever am lucky enough to find it.

You are my favourite. Knowing you are happy will in time enable me to be happy. My tears are bittersweet – both happy and sad. What a profound mark we have left on each other’s lives. Thank you – for being you.

Yours,

Sage xo