Light

May 13, 2012

Dear Raymond,

Did you notice that every time right when i’m about to leave, you tap me on my arm and say great to see you? Some days you say something different but the tap on the arm is always there. And some other times you tap me on the arm when you see me. How many arms do you tap in a day? Not a complaint my love just a query. I think the day you go without the tap I would probably be quite bothered! I guess it is all polite manners & decorum. Too bad we cant just throw our arms around one another & be done with the tap.

I think the last time I saw you I was on such a high that when I saw you again everything inevitably would plateau. It’s the whole what comes up must come down thing. I really didnt have an official reason to stop in. I’m quite happy and contented these days which might make for a boring conversation. You really are a marvel to me. Some days you are like an open book while others you are all business. It all adds to the mystery I find in you.

I take the taxi quite often these days and I have gotten this young middle eastern man as my driver. He feels like he can confide in me and so he tells me his story of the unrequited love that is driving him a little mad as well. He goes to the same restaurant every monday and thursday and drives three or four towns over just to see her. He’s tried talking to her friend, leaving his number on a napkin but the young muslim woman in question is as silent as stars. He asks for my advice, I tell him try sending her flowers. I tell him it might be her culture that is holding her back. It could be that she is already betrothed. He says he has never felt this way about anyone else. He says the drive and meals are worth just being in her presence. At the end of the cab ride I lamented, “loving someone you cant be with sucks”. He agreed wholeheartedly.

You told me today that you always saw me in this certain light. That you could see me dealing with problems but the me was in there all along. I really was trying to convey something to you. I’m not sure you took it in or maybe you were deflecting. So I am writing it to you in this letter, so you will be reminded. I’m so glad that you’re here for this part of my journey. I never expected to see you in the future. I feel blessed to have you in my life. You inspire me. Take extra care of yourself for me please.

Best,

Sage